Why do so many people get divorced?

Why do so many people get divorced?

In my experience, both professionally and personally, it is because somebody wasn’t authentic.

So… the person that you married is not the person that you end up being married to now.

They put on an act.

They pretended to be someone they were not.

In the extreme this could be gold diggers or narcissists, or…

People who are so attracted to you that they pretend to be what they think you want…

Why pretending to be someone you are not fails

But sadly that is not going to work.

It’s not going to be a match.

One of you is going to feel tricked.

One of you is going to be disappointed.

It’s a bit like going on a blind day and putting up filtered, false photos.

Or lying about your age, or your weight, or your height, or…

Anything.

If you say you’re 35 but you’re really 50, and you look younger, the person who you meet is going to be disappointed because they wanted to date a 35 year old.

Why not date 50 year olds or above who want to date 50 year olds?

And if there aren’t any of those in the world then just date yourself.

Lying causes relationships to fail

Lying in order to attract someone who does not want you is not a successful approach in life.

So many people are not authentic because they don’t like themselves.

Well in that case change yourself or…

Grow to like yourself.

But just be yourself.

I get tired of people saying to me oh you know just relax just be yourself just put some scruffy leggings on.

Don’t!

No!

Excuse me… that’s not me!

I don’t want to lie on the couch,watch Netflix and eat pizza. To me that feels like I’m in prison. I would much rather wear something beautiful, dress up every day and feel great about myself, whether I see anyone else or not.

But other people find that difficult to believe because they just want to slob out. Well if that’s you, then you need to marry someone who wants to slob out as well, otherwise you’re not going to get on.

So that is the message.

Be authentic.

Be yourself and if you don’t like yourself change.

How to be yourself

Get to know yourself.

What are your habits?

Faults?

Likes?

Dislikes?

Hobbies?

Dreams?

Ambitions?

Favourite things?

Fears?

Bucket list?

If you can’t answer any of these questions…

You don’t know yourself.

Spend time getting to know yourself before you seek out someone to share your life with.